I have a really cute friend named Darcy. Dar and I go way back to 2003 and have been roommates, classmates and coworkers.
In 2003 at BYU-Idaho it was totally cool to write notes and quotes on the front of your fridge with a dry-erase marker. I know I have a picture of this somewhere…from 2003, even. It was great because your fridge is a built-in whiteboard, if you have a white fridge. You just have to make sure you’re using dry-erase markers and then you can just wipe it off with windex and a soft cloth and the next tenants in your apartment are none the wiser.
Just a little tip, just for you.
One day I was over at Dar’s and I glanced over at her fridge. I did not find tediously printed notable quotes, coined by roommates in the wee hours of the morning, drunk on caffeine and sleep-deprivation and the giggles (like in my apartment), but two words, scrawled in large capital across the freezer, saying:
TRY HARDER.
It was in Dar’s handwriting so I asked her what the deal was. Her answer was pretty simple and I’ve always remembered it:
“Sometimes, I don’t feel like I’m trying hard enough, so I tell myself to try harder.”
Who hasn’t been there?
Lately, I am totally in that mode. That mode where I know I need to try harder, and pretty soon, I will. I’ll hit my groove, I’ll be in the zone, and it will feel great. I feel it coming on, it’s starting to tickle a little bit, and I’m enjoying my laziness, but not for long. And I feel fine. I’m happy enough. I do the things I should I’m just not trying hard enough.
I’ve had these three big goals since I graduated from college. Maybe someday I’ll share them with you. But we’ll just say now that they are hefty things, and this year I’ve done two of them.
It feels great! (And no, one of them was not “get married.” That was an added bonus and a help to me in reaching some of my goals.)
I think if I try harder, I can accomplish the third of them by my birthday on November 28th (I want a navy blue Hobo, a chevron rug for my living room and a new bottle of Viva La Juicy [hey, just in case]).
Sometimes I think we don’t reach our goals because we set wimpy goals. It’s this mental block that I know happens to me, and maybe it happens to you. Basically, we know the end is so closely within reach, we don’t try as hard as we should, and we never reach it. If it’s a big goal, we’ll take big strides to get it done and actually have a better chance of reaching it. Does that make sense to you? Because I think this is a true principle. Like that equation that approaches zero but never equals zero.
For example, how many people do you know who are trying to lose five pounds, but they never do it?
Contrast that with the number of people you know who need to lose 50 pounds and are actually making pretty good progress.
Keep in mind this isn’t just people who need to lose weight, but people who are “trying” to lose weight.
Sometimes I “try” to lose weight while eating the same things I always eat and not upping my exercise. See? Try harder.
Anyway, thanks Darcy. I need to try harder, and I am picturing your old freezer right now. It’s pushing me on to get where I want to be!
Now let’s all get out there and do our best! Who’s with me?
3 comments:
You're welcome, Holls! Honestly... I don't even remember having that on my fridge, but since it impacted you so much, I think it might just make a comeback!
It seems to me that the more complex our lives become (e.g. marriage, jobs, kids, hobbies, kids, blogs, church, etc.) the higher our "set point" is; or, in other words, the things I used to think were "above and beyond" are now on my list of everyday "must-do" tasks. Somehow, we evolve into creatures that are able to withstand and accomplish a much wider array of tasks.
Thankfully, the potential our lives have for joy expands exponentially with each addition, which makes it all, simply, worth it.
Love ya.
Great post, Holls. I'll try harder with you, too. I've noticed that having somebody there to help you reach your goals and encourage you to reach them helps a lot. They say that goals should be S.M.A.R.T. Specific, Measurable, Action-oriented, Realistic, Timely. Something like that. I also like to think of goals as D.U.M.B. Daring, Understandable, Dorky, and Big. Actually, let's go with S.M.A.R.T.
Love,
Mark
You don't actually know me, but I connected to your blog from Darcy's. I hope you don't mind if I comment on your post.
I just have to say that I agree with you 100 percent. I think it is too easy to live in mediocre land or where we're comfortable and to be content with where we are instead of pushing ourselves to work harder. I just had an experience tonight that proved to me just how true this is.
My problem is that goal-setting has never been something I'm very good at, but perhaps it's time for me to really start doing so. I've already done some things this year that I wouldn't have ever thought I could do, but perhaps it's time to push even harder.
Anyway, thanks for giving me some food for thought. And, again I hope it's okay that I commented about this. It's a great post.
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