CSPRT (Crazy Single Person Ritualistic Tendencies)

It has recently come to my attention that I harbor crazy single person ritualistic tendencies. I have never noticed them before.

Do you believe me? Because this is real talk. I did not notice them until like, last week.

Por ejemplo: my boyfriend walks me home (doesn’t that sound nice?) and it’s bed time. A healthy person would go upstairs, brush her teeth, take off her makeup and crawl into bed.

I, on the other hand, get a diet coke, find my laptop, Facebook for a solid 15 minutes so I can gossip with myself, see if any of my shows have new episodes posted, watch one if so, shower and then do a full blow out so my hair doesn’t look crazy when I wake up, then stew, wonder or worry about something for a while until I’m tired enough to go to sleep.

Then I brush my teeth, take off my makeup and crawl into bed.

I’m telling you. Crazy single person ritualistic tendencies.

The only explanation I have for them is that I’m used to doing my thing on my own, and just because I have a life doesn't mean I'm willing to completely cut out my hanging out with myself time.

Reminds me of the time when...
Rachel: Well, I can’t go with him on Sunday! I have plans on Sunday.
Monica: What plans?
Rachel: I’m going to dinner.
Monica: Who with?
Rachel: Myself. I can’t go off and do something with someone else when I already have plans with myself.
Monica: So, you’re saying that you can’t go out with the nice man because if you do, you would be CHEATING on yourself?
Rachel: Well sure, if you want to make me sound CRAZY.

Will you please now be a pal and confess that you also have some crazy?

life's lessons learned at the sev.

today at the happy 7-11 by my office, jon the cashier asked me how i was doing. my day had been tolerable but i was miffed at verizon, which is what i told him. when i asked how his day was going, he said,

“oh, it’s been great. i just love seeing what people are wearing when they come in here.”

and you know, veiled criticism of my outfit or not, i'll be darned if jon's statement didn't capture the true essence of joy in life.

i mean, at least 40% of life's joys (60% if you're at a county fair somewhere).

did YOU learn anything useful at your local 7-11 today?

Dreaming of you tonight.

Sometimes, I have dreams that I’m smoking. I have never even tried smoking anything at any point in my life.

Ever.

Yet in my dreams, there I am, taking long, deep drags in secret places and relishing every moment. In these dreams, I always smoke in secret and I only do it sometimes.

But I love it (while I’m asleep).

Today I walked into work and Beckie said, “I had a dream about you last night.” I demanded explanation in excruciating detail, natch.

She said that in her dream, she walked past me and I smelled like cigarettes and I had an old one in my pocket. And she also said that she confronted me about it and didn’t want to be my friend anymore once she knew I was a smoker.

This is like psychic friends dream interaction.

What does it mean?

hey!

you should listen to this song!

it reminds me of something morrissey would do.




"the girls in their summer dresses" by the airborne toxic event

More on how much I love technology.

I heart last.fm for all my free Internet streaming music. I used Pandora for a while until I realized that I hated it. Or that it just didn’t work right for my needs.

And I need free stuff I get on the Internet to work, people.

Today while I was listening when I heard (just the beginning – it was all I could handle) of a song called, “If You Talk Too Much (My Head Will Explode).”

Dead serious.

Do you know this song? It's about a girl who fears her head will explode if the subject of the song talks too much.

I'll just let that ruminate.

Little gems on Twitter.

A’ight. I’m on Twitter (just like Ashton Kutcher!). And I have a few followers, and I follow a few people, but I mostly twitter-stalk. I don’t put out a lot of tweets other than “retweeting” which is essentially forwarding a tweet so that other people can see what someone I follow is talking about.

Is any of this making sense?

Basically, now that snail mail has gone the way of the polyester pantsuit, I feel that I must retweet daily to keep the spirit of annoying chain letters alive. And since I don’t do memes, well…this is all I’ve got.

In somewhat related news, I follow my pretend boyfriend, Jimmy Fallon. And he tweets things like this:

“Madonna was thrown from a horse this weekend when the horse was startled by the paparazzi and knocked her off. The injuries are pretty serious…she still hasn’t regained full use of her British accent.”

It’s not the funniest thing in the world, but it breaks up the geek speak in my day.

Thank you, Twitter.

I would like very much to compress this post into 140 characters so that the whole Twittersphere would know how much I love you.

...seriously?

***update: kathleen, you win today. i think this is indeed lady gaga's poker face. man, she was right...you cannot read it.