someone gag me.

today while i was browsing headlines, i came across this little number which is a fantastic read, if you want to know. put plainly, it exposes heidi and spencer's plot to take over the world.

now, the best part about this whole thing to me is that they think they are taking over the world and going right for our brains, when really this poor reporter warning us about it has actually fallen victim to their plot.

"They want to become bigger than Ryan Seacrest. They want to become bigger than
Oprah. If Ryan Seacrest and Oprah had a baby together, and that baby grew up and married Suri Cruise and THEY had a baby, Heidi and Spencer want to be even bigger than that baby."

see, you know and i know that heidi and spencer are only taking over the world they share together in their minds. you and i notice that in all "guerilla-style," "paprazzi" photos, heidi and spencer are always camera ready, always looking at the camera, and are always looking at it with their eager puppy eyes..."ooo! photograph me, sir!" i will also cite an important quote from "the soup" from several months ago where our pal joel comments that all heidi does is "take out the trash 17 times a day in hopes of being featured in us weekly's section, 'stars: they're just like us!'"

i get the irony that i'm here devoting a whole post to heidi and spencer when i claim they have no hold on me. but puh-leeeese. i didn't miss them at the hills finale for a second. in fact, i didn't realize they weren't there until i read this article.

i will though, hand it to the writer for having journalistic integrity and telling us the full story. just be sure to check your facts next time, buddy: i think you mean spencer's sister stephanie, not heidi's.