Next time you forget you’re Blair Waldorf, remember I’m Chuck Bass and I love you.

Chuck, I’m hoping for another good one-liner tonight. Don’t let us down.

dove dark with almonds = best valentine’s day ever.

dove is definitely the bossiest of all the candies. the valentine’s day ones are especially brazen, imploring me to do all kinds of crazy stuff:

“sleep under the stars”
“cherish the romantic moments in your day”
“get swept away by love”
“laugh until your heart overflows” <--what the h is that supposed to mean?

sleep under the stars? yeah…and catch another cold? no, thanks.

as far as the second two…i’ll do those when i’m good and ready, thankyouverymuch.

and the last one, well, make of that what you will.

i challenge you to find a pushier brand of chocolate. also, good luck finding a tastier one. my grandmother gave me a bag of those dove darks with little toasted almond bits in them, and holy heart failure, batman. they are goo-ood.

you should go get some. i bet they’re on sale by now.

exciting news.

you. i need to talk to...both of you...about something exciting.

i have exciting news that people are talking about. (name that movie i probably misquoted.)

it's called the sweet tooth fairy bake shop and if you live in utah, you need to go to there immediately if not sooner.

i just went. yes, i enjoy baked goods now and again. if i didn't, this blog would be called, "since i'm really skinny."

now that that's cleared up.

i selected a black and white cookie (chocolate cookie with "signature" cream cheese frosting) and a strawberry shortcake cupcake (some kind of white flavored cake with real strawberry frosting and a slice of chocolate covered strawberry on top).

i'll be honest, i thought i'd prefer the cookie. and ok, it was basically the best cookie i've tasted in years (sorry, mom, grandma and all my aunts). but then i tried the cupcake and i said out loud when i tasted that frosting:

are you kidding me right now?

friends, this is the frosting we will eat on everything in heaven.

like seriously, go there and get that damn cupcake. you won't be sorry.

omfg.

discuss.

ps - sorry for the anticlimactic pic. i wanted the one with blair comforting a totally wasted chuck. *sigh*

photo courtesy of the cw.

why you hafta do me like that?

dear 30 rock,

what the heck, people?! i have been talking you up to basically everyone i meet, and you let me down. i just hope none of my "investigators" were watching for the first time tonight. talk about embarrassing.

gosh, it would be like bringing a friend to church and having the weird old lady get up and go on a incoherent racist rant before one of the even more expressive congregation members makes his way to the pulpit to perform a rousing rendition of "pour some sugar on me." with bagpipes.

that's what it would be like. i'm not kidding.

last week was actually funny. i have included a recap of that good episode below my signature for your review. please try to live up to this in the future.

disappointed but still committed,

hollylynn

byob

or should i say byodc? meaning of course, bring your own diet coke.

i've mentioned that one of the many reasons i love my job is the coke fridge in the break room that is typically stocked with dc.

we ran out today.

it was hard on us all. i even drank a coke zero (i know, i know). usually, nothing can take diet coke's place. when you want one, you want one. you know? reminds me of a time i was out to eat with a friend who feels similarly at a place that only has pepsi products (how could we not have known?). when my friend asked for a diet coke, we were told that the closest thing they had was diet pepsi. looking up solemnly, he replied,

"just this once."

i was shocked at his defection but it did give me the strength to venture out and order one as well.

i just read this post. i think i have what some members of the medical community may call a "problem."

if so, someone call dr. drew. i might be having some crazy withdrawal side effects tomorrow.

30 rock.

can you wait? i couldn't wait. if your patience level is anything like mine, you should click here.

a big thanks to becky for pointing this out to me!

hold still for a sec...

...while i give you a cookie recipe (no, not THE cookie recipe) that will make your fall feel festive and make people like you.

i learned it from jacque anne. one of the reasons i love her so.

1 (small) can of pumpkin
1 spice cake mix
1/2 bag mini chocolate chips

mix all ingredients together. drop by heaping tablespoonfuls on a cookie sheet. bake at 350 F for 10-12 minutes. you don't want to underbake these things. they're done when they bounce back a little when you touch them (you know...like cake).

a love letter.

dear chuck bass,

what is your deal, anyway? i want so badly to know who messed you up. because i love you.

you're a dirty rotten scoundrel, and i want to help you.

if you ever looked at me with that little glare thing you do, i would probably want to laugh, but i would hold it in because i love your preppy arrogance.

i love it.

and so does blair. blair is the only woman i would surrender you to.

so give a sister a break. she will come around.

xoxo,

hollylynn

meat is the new bread!

i have a feeling that a lot of you missed this video because my blog did something screwy and put this video a few posts down. but you need to watch it.
yay alec baldwin
yay tina fey
yay tracy jordan...eh...morgan
yay yay yay

30 Rock - The Meat Machine Movies & TV SPIKE.com

teehee.

today i made some chicken in my george foreman grill and it reminded me of the tracy jordan meat machine. and i got really excited for 30 rock to start up on oct. 30.

30 Rock - The Meat Machine Movies & TV SPIKE.com

this is why i'm hot.

today i was paying for my icy diet coke at 7-11 when jon the cashier told me that my necklace was very nice and that it matched my dress perfectly.

AND that i had good fashion sense.

this might be the most memorable thing that has ever happened to me while buying an icy diet coke at 7-11.

the end.

shout me a holler.

kathleen and erin like to say this. i would like to shout a holler to my new best gal pal, gofugyourself.com. if you're not already following it, not only have you been missing out, you will live and die by it for it's frequent posting and it's clever turn of phrase (i just sounded like tobias funke).

now, you know how i feel about slyly mocking peoples' outfits when they're not around to defend themselves. i LOVE it!

aside from the fact that you can't say the name of this blog quickly or loudly without sounding like you have turret's syndrome (hey, today i was reading go fug yourself! and i saw this really ugly dress...), it's some dang good writing about some dang interesting outfits. and don't worry, the writer gives credit where credit's due and often points out those celebs that are looking extra good.

you should now go and read it. i said now.

i heart saturdays.

today i was sitting in my bed around noonish (don't hate), having a fine breakfast of popcorn and diet coke (don't judge) and happened upon the greatest film collaboration of hilary duff and heather locklear of all time: the critically acclaimed, the perfect man (oscar nods all around). i didn't realize that mr big was in this movie. he is. and he pretty much plays, well, mr big. also adding to the film's fabulosity is carson of "how to look good naked" and "queer eye for the straight guy."

my fav quote, by far, of this entire movie is one of the carson quotes. when asked if he's a jet's fan, carson retorts:

omg, hello?! i live for westside story!

stereotypical and marginalizing? yes. still funny? mmhmm.

who says there's no such thing as a free slurpee?

ok. so i ripped this old timey ad off from mindi quite some time ago and have just been chomping at the bit for the most applicable shameless stealing/repurposing of it.

today was free slurpee day at the sev...that's 7-11 for you non-believers...not that 7-11 customers are a cult. (remember on friends when joey has the days of our lives party on the roof and he tells rachel, "oh, no. that's guy's in a cult. and it'll cost you $5000 to get to level three, and i don't feel any different!" yeah. that was a really good episode.)

so it was. and a coupla my work colleagues and i decided to partake. now i'm sure you've all heard my yoga mantra:

i don't drink calories.

this is also stolen, but from my real life friend melissa who needs to hurry up and get a blog. today i decided to walk on the wild side and get a coke slurpee. i was not sorry! i think i have a new policy: i don't drink calories unless it is free slurpee day, in which case, get a coke slurpee and don't feel bad about it at all.

the end.

a couple reasons i'm excited for fall.

***CLARIFICATION: the office has intentionally been left off of this list. the office needs to get over itself. i am pretty stoked for kim and kath though.***

1. i wholeheartedly enjoy wool cardigans and my vintage frye boots

("they were my mom's in the 80's")

2. well, this one actually breaks down:

a. gossip girl
b. the hills
c. 30 rock
d. top model
e. 90210

hot cop! or, put that on your blog and smoke it.

i hope you know about hot cops by now.

"they're not even real cops! they're strippers! look how hot they are!" -gob bluth (arrested development)

at lagoon this week, i had the great joy/misfortune of seeing a snippet of the live performances they put on there. from what i can piece together from my memory and the memories of others, men danced around, singing u2 songs, i believe, in flowy outfits which were then ripped away by their female co-performers to reveal more revealing outfits. one appeared to have some sort of law enforcement uniform on, with cutoff pants and sleeves. i also believe one had a tool belt. they were either hot cops or the village people. it was confusing.

here is another performance. i mean...you be the judge.

definitely reminiscent of the hot cops.

i wish i could quit you.

oh, who are we kidding? i would never* quit diet coke!

so one of the many perks of my marvelous job is that you can literally have all the diet coke you want. it's back there in this fridge thing, and you're allowed, nay, encouraged, to have at it. the one complaint i have about this system, if i may make one, is that the stock is never really up to par with my coldness standards. picky i know, but when you once drank diet coke from a sippy cup (or was it tab? i don't remember. i was 1. jk. i don't think my parents gave me tab in a sippy cup...), by the time you're an adult you kinda like what you like if you know what i mean.

i like a dc that's been waiting all day for you in the back of the fridge. you pop it open (chipahhh) and ice forms on the top. the can looks frosty when you set it down. you wonder who invented diet coke, and if they're still alive to accept some fan mail or maybe a big kiss from you. you suddenly remember stuff you have to do, and you have the wherewith all to actually do it.

but i've gotta say that this week, the work coke has definitely gotten colder. definitely. and i could not be happier.

the end.

*unless i got an ulcer. then i would have to quit. you can die from those things, you know?

chin up, campers.

yesterday, dear kathleen gave me the best news. one of my odd celebrity crushes, jason bateman, pictured real big up top here, is getting a new show. yessss.

don't worry, dvds of arrested development, you'll still have your turn. here is what perez hilton says about the good news:

"Our favorite Silver Spoon-er (sorry, Ricky Schroder) is doing good for himself.
Jason Bateman has scored a deal with 20th Century Fox TV to develop TV series, as well as produce and direct projects.
Does Bateman thank the stars every day for his career jolting stint on Arrested Development?!
The actor is diversifying and raking in the bucks!
"I'm an avid consumer of television, and I've got varying tastes," Bateman said. According to Variety, he also said he'd love to pattern his production banner after those of other actors who have successfully made the transition to producing, including his Arrested boss, Ron 'Opey' Howard.
We won't mind seeing more of Jason Bateman!"

amen, perez! you may not have the best hair on earth but i sure share your love of jason! and muchas gracias a mi amiga kathleen for sharing the good news.

geez, i hope so!

lauren and audrina both seem marginally convinced that their friendship will survive hurricane lo. i'm rooting for you, girlies.

http://tvwatch.people.com/2008/06/06/lauren-audrina-say-separately-things-will-work-out/?xid=rss-topheadlines